Guest Blogger- Sarai

Whose To Blame?

 

Some part of me wants to blame You for allowing me to fall for him.

Part of me wants to ask You why You let my emotions get so deeply involved.

I want to cry out and ask why You let me love him so much when he could care less about me.

Why did You let him kiss me? Why did You allow him to touch me?

Some part of me wants to ask why didn’t You protect my heart better.

 

You helped me keep my ground when it came to others.

You helped me wait for over five years

But he came along and effortlessly had everything I held back on for so long.

 

I want to ask You why was it so easy for me to fall for him.

Why did You allow me to fall for someone who would only hurt me?

Someone who doesn’t even want to be friends.

I wonder  why you didn’t you make me stronger when it came to him.

 

I want to blame You for this heartache I’m feeling

But in reality it was all my fault.

I let him kiss me. I wanted him to.

I let him use me.

I let him come and go as he pleased.

I knew there were others he paid more attention to.

I knew he wasn’t giving me what I deserved

But I stayed.

 

I wish I could blame him. I sometimes want to blame You

But it was me all along.

I am to blame.

 

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